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A STRONGER VOICE by Mud Toe Sasquatch
Easter Sunday, one year ago, I stood next to my mother. She likes me
to accompany her to Easter services, so my eternal soul does not fall
into damnation. For my part, I enjoy the Eucharist service, sharing
the body and blood of Jesus Christ. It takes me back to my roots, and
makes me feel part of something larger. Mostly, though, I enjoy the
music, and Easter music is the best of the church year. Many people
prefer Christmas music – with its lilting beauty, it is much more
accessible. Easter music, on the other hand, smashes and crashes.
Jesus is back, and he’s kicking ass and taking names. The music is
big and loud, but also requires precision. You have to be a good
singer to do Easter music well.
I was a good singer, when I was young. I’d toast the Easter music,
and people in nearby pews would look over at me in wonder and
jealousy. It was one of the few things that got me attention, and I
played it for all it was worth. But that was many years ago, and at
Easter Sunday, one year ago, I struggled. Couldn’t hit the high
notes, wavered on the medium notes, kept running out of breath. I
got so frustrated, I didn’t even attempt the final hymn, “Now All the
Vault of Heaven Resounds,” because I knew I couldn’t do it justice. I
was pissed off all day – time and change and robbed me of yet another
thing I loved.
It might have ended there, but as it happened, there was a music store
next to the office where I was working, and one morning a sign
appeared, advertising music lessons, First Lesson Free! It took me a
few weeks to work up the nerve, but I showed up one day, and a tall,
youngish guy named Neil put me through my musical paces. I told him I
wanted to be able to hit the high notes at church, and he said he
could help me with that. $99 for 4 weekly lessons, and we went to
We sang scales, church music, Elvis, and The Beatles. I could feel my
voice getting stronger right away, and the stronger it got, the more I
wanted to work. At the end of every month, there was a “jam session,”
where all the music students were encouraged to show what they could
do. I skipped the first few months, but when I finally went, I found
the guitarists and bassists and drummers to be very talented and
supportive. It was amazing how quickly they picked up music – I threw
out “I Saw Her Standing There,” they started speaking in their guitar
code —, D, C, D, 6 beats, key change — and we were performing the
song in five minutes.
As I left that night, feeling better about myself than I had in
months, the bass player handed me a card. “There’s a jam session on
Wednesday nights at the Blue Pickle Bar,” he informed me. “Why don’t
you come out and sing with us sometime?”
And so I did. Often, the guitarist, the bass player, and I were the
only ones there, and I got to sing for two hours solid. Other times,
other musicians would show up, and we would share the wealth. It’s
become the high point of my week. Often, I think of how I might bring
that energy into the rest of my life. I wonder if it isn’t about
positive reinforcement, having others recognize what I do, but isn’t
it also true that I never would have found that feedback if I’d never
gone to that music lesson and put myself out there in the first place?
But even with the jam sessions, I hadn’t met my goal, which was to
reconquer Easter. This year, I went back, with my mother at my side
as always. Most of the hymns were rather pedestrian, but the closer
was “Christ the Lord is Risen Today.” I freakin’ nailed it.
Mud Toe’s voice is risen. It is risen indeed.
*** Copyright 2016 by Mud Toe Sasquatch —- all rights reserved
Orb Weavers rebuild their webs every night, often using the very same anchor threads from the night before. No matter the cost, the strife, the conflict, the resources spent in the process, this eight-legged Relation of ours shows just one of many paths to enlightenment.
“Build a frame
and stick to it, I always say.
Life’s a circle.
Just keep going around.
Do your work, then
sit back and see
what falls in your lap.
Eat your triumphs,
eat your mistakes:
that way your belly will always be full.
Use what you have.
Rest when you need to.
Dawn will come soon enough.
Someone has to remake
the world each night.
It might as well be you.”
Dark Emperor – J. Sidman, 2010
By systematically raising the instruments of ethics, peace, and Wyaykihn, and subjecting those instruments to the ritualistic scrutiny of introspection and study, tearing down pre-conceived notions and bias, and then rebuilding the web that forms the foundation of our beliefs, we do something similar to our little arachnid Sister. When the day comes in our personal lives that the sturdy, well fashioned and perfect matrix of our spiritual devotion is torn down by hurt, sorrow, anger, stress, logic, fear, and- most especially- depression, we will have the core memory (and ability) to begin building again. Sometimes even when the world itself seems to be unraveling before our eyes. Slowly, with determination concealed by the night’s lonely shroud, we will scurry invisibly within the shadows until the sun rises upon the rainbow-gilt brilliance of a miraculous work.
If, at times, it feels as though one’s destiny is to continuously look into the deepest shadows of pain, loss, and fear, never truly surfacing enough to free oneself from the next plunge, think of this little Elder (and take heart), whose very creation demands the nightly destruction of one of the costliest and most spectacular feats known in the animal kingdom. So much beauty lost every night! Such sacrifice! Such resilience!
Oh Wyaykihn, Solihtstaynah! May we learn to Look Within and see the good, pure, intelligent, mighty, powerful, spiritual beings that we are! May we also see what might be improved, strengthened, restored, and then seek the guidance and courage to make changes for the better! Like our eight-legged cousin, may we learn to build in the shadows and rest in the light, ready to rebuild when darkness falls again!
As we say in Nemenhah Itsipi: All My Relations! Thank you for being here today… It is Good for Us to be Here!
Jonathan “Wellamotkin” Landis
Elected Principle Medicine Chief – Nemenhah ITO
Certified Minister and Medicine Man
Dance – not only is it a great way to exercise , it also helps to build confidence and self esteem. This applies to any form of dance you choose. When you dance, your mind, body and spirit all engage as ONE.
You feel the blood flowing through your veins, you feel every breath you take, it connects every aspect of your being.
Your mind is fully engaged during the process. It helps to focus your train of thought, moves your arms in one direction, your feet and hands in another, maintains and controls your breathing so that you have stamina to last, all simultaneously .
There are many benefits to dance, improving posture, balance, breathing capacity and self discipline are just a few. Music is the medium to let your inner energies flow and music is one of the universal languages that everyone can understand or relate to.
Dancing can be used for healing your body and mind. By keeping your joints active, this helps with pain caused by arthritis or similar afflictions. If you have pent up emotions, anger issues, or if you suffer from low self esteem, dancing is a way to release them in a non violent manner. It’s a way to express yourself or your emotions without hurting others, a way to take something negative and create something positive. It helps strengthen your core, strengthens your heart and lungs.
When you dance your body sweats, releasing unwanted toxins, your muscles tone, it’s easier to manage your weight and improves circulation along with working the cardio. You will feel more energized throughout the day.
Take 15-20 minutes a day to just dance, you will notice a difference in no time at all and your mind, body and spirit will thank you.
If you’re on a spiritual journey of any kind, I’m sure you’ve run across a few “spiritual narcissists.”
Who are they?
These are the spiritual teachers/leaders that think they know it all. It’s their way only and anytime you express your beliefs they’ll try to make you see and believe their beliefs as if they’re somehow superior to yours or anyone else’s. They may even put YOU down for not believing their “way.”
The spiritual narcissist wants control just as a regular narcissist does. These types are severely closed-minded as they cannot see anyone else’s beliefs as something that might work or be true. This is a result of fear within themselves still and not being able to control their own environment. They need to control to feel safe.
The only truth is that there is no right or wrong in anything. It is whatever works for you as an individual at the time you need it. To each is own! That, is the only thing that makes sense, as we are all on a different path even though in the spiritual world, we are all as one.
These types will preach, “We are all one”, yet turn around and judge someone or something. They may even bully you, put you down in judgement, even making you feel dumb, for your beliefs.
The spiritual narcissist is nothing more than a manipulator, trying to control everyone and everything around them to see that their way is the only way – the “right” way.
A true spiritual teacher/leader, does not bash, bully, or judge another’s beliefs as they have learned that to be all one, then we need to have empathy and understanding that it all leads to the same thing in a basic sense.
This person will live what they preach/teach. Their work and way of life will show their true colors. True spiritual people know what it is said to love and will show that, their actions will speak louder than just their words.
A true spiritual person can see both sides of a coin and know that they’re both okay. The spiritual narcissist will only see one side of the same coin and try to hide the other side from your sight.
A true spiritual person who is in check within, can only help you in a way by sharing what they may have experienced and how that led them to believe the way they do. In this, it may trigger you to awaken and do the same, but don’t get hung up on someone else’s way, stay true to your own.
If any spiritual teacher/leader discredits your belief system, BEWARE!
Nothing should be discredited! We may be “all one” yet we are so very “different” – and that alone should be beautiful and okay.
Here are 12 ways to recognize a spiritual narcissist:
1. When you speak of your belief system-they immediately discredit this and try to sway you to their beliefs.
2. They will put you down, laugh at you, or even downright bully you, for not seeing things their way as the correct way.
3. They are still judging you, other’s, or other belief systems.
4. They get very mad or upset with you when you question or go against what they believe as truth.
5. When you try to discuss, they are always preoccupied with themselves.
6. They are never wrong.
7. They cannot handle any criticism.
8. They think they have more abilities than you do.
9. They are very competitive with other spiritual teachers/leaders and will talk bad about them.
10. They try to make you think you are stupid/unknowledgeable. (this is manipulation)
11. They get mad at you for seeking out other spiritual teachers/leaders.
12. They seem detached from their own emotions.
There is no “my way or the highway”, “supreme knowledge”, “this way”, or “that way”, to be right.
Any and every way is what’s right, for the individual.
Narcissist are energy “vampires”. You may run into quite a few out there in the vast “spiritual” communities. They feed off of your weakness, your newly awakening self. You are fresh blood…
They love an empath, as many awakened people are one, like a fly to a fresh pile of crap. (Sorry, it’s true.) The beginner is where they feed and thrive initially. Just beware!
These people will take much pride in how many followers they have as well and even boast about it.
The spiritual journey is very much a healing journey. But you can truly only heal yourself when you are ready, in your own way. It could be that another’s truth’s or experiences trigger you to start your own awakening but don’t lose yourself to their journey, stay on your course.
Everyone of us have abilities-some more than other’s yes-but everyone has the ability to go as far with their healing as they choose for themselves-in their own timing. This, should be okay.
The reason you become enlightened is not because of someone else. It is because your soul said it was time. You are the only one responsible for your awakening/healing/enlightenment. If a spiritual teacher/leader makes you think it was because of them, you are most likely dealing with a spiritual narcissist. If anyone tries to “dumb your belief’s down”, run and run fast in the opposite direction as to not get caught in their web.
Most spiritually awakened people find themselves to be empathic. Think of an empath as a sponge and the spiritual narcissist as water. What happens when a sponge is immersed with water? It gets weighed down. It can’t even wring itself out, it has to wait for the water to evaporate on its own. Don’t be the sponge..
Create boundaries and stick to them so that you don’t become weighed down by someone unhealthy.
Spiritual narcissist are no dummies (however very weak inside), they are in fact very smart people, after all, it takes a lot of thinking and brain power to have control over other’s and sway other’s under their spell. Manipulation takes brains, not emotions.
We are all students here so it really doesn’t matter your level of knowledge, you just need to do your own research as to what feels right to and for you. The “spiritual” world is very much this physical world as we are here experiencing, together. So, question everything and everyone if something doesn’t feel right to or for you.
Do not however question your gut instincts. These are very seldom wrong.
Question those that bash your beliefs. It’s one thing to converse with other’s that believe differently, but when bashing or judging occurs, it has turned to something else that is in fact not spiritual ar all..
Beliefs are said to be nothing more than lie’s anyway. (beLIEfs).
But I’d rather believe in something than absolutely nothing all day long.
It is not in my belief that any of us are here to hurt another or compete with another. If someone wants to compete, walk away instead of feeding into their fear, because competition is nothing but fear. There is an ample amount of whatever we need to go around to all in this giant Universe.
I just hope your spiritual journey is a great one albeit most likely not easy..
Don’t let anyone dumb you down for your beliefs. If whatever you’re believing is working for you then have at it and don’t stop believing!
The best truth that I can think of at this moment is that none of us have a real clue (we don’t know crap!), but if it’s working for you then stick with that. With that said… Carry on.
( I secretly hope you’re listening to these songs and listening to the lyrics, lol.)
Also, upon your spiritual awakening journey, you may find yourself telling everyone you know about your new found awakening/beliefs. You might even have a glow about you like a freshly pregnant woman. This is all okay, as long as you don’t think it’s the ONLY way, if so, you may have just become a spiritual narcissist yourself.
You may find that your old ways or life that you were leading just doesn’t suffice any longer. Maybe because that was the old you that your soul has been trying to shake free all along. But you just kept hanging on.. It’s okay, stay or break free, do as you have to do to free your soul and make it happy.
(I’m still cracking up laughing at this video..LOL) However, there will always be a small part of that old you that will always be by your side like a shadow. Awakening is learning how to deal with and handle the new you and your shadow, at the same time. For all we really are is, “Dust in the WInd”.. (Song by Kansas).
Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to “Pour Some Sugar On me”, ((YES!! Another damn song…) (Def Leppard rocks!!) because part of this whole journey is about learning to love yourself! I love you as well!
I just pray your spiritual journey is a peaceful one!
“The two most important days in your life are the day you are born,
and the day you find out why.” ~ Mark Twain
Susan Nicole Wright
Susan Nicole Wright is a Psychic Medium/Spiritual Life Path/Empowerment Coach, as well as Reiki Master Teacher. She has been gifted and in touch with the spirit world since early childhood which has led to her 40+ years of experience. Blessed with this gift from God, allows her to assist others with the process of healing, by connecting them with their friends/loved ones that are on the “Other Side”. Susan has read for people from all over the globe, including prominent business people and celebrities!
You can learn more about Susan from her WEBSITE.
To all the men out there, all of you who have been working on your Divine Masculine self, either consciously or subconsciously, I wish to apologize to you. I have not met most of you, but this is still offered to all men.
I want to apologize for myself, and in a most humble way, for all women. Some women may not agree with what I am being guided to share but I hope many will.
I am sorry for all of the times I wished you thought and acted like a woman. I wanted you to be able to communicate your feelings with me and not escape to your Man-Cave, and was hurt and angry when you needed to disappear to mull your feelings over solo. I felt abandoned.
I’m sorry for the painful, cutting ways I spoke with you when I was feeling wounded, (ah … just about all of my life), by you as an individual and all of you as a species. It has felt many times as if you are another species, alien, to me at least. I suspect many women will agree with me on this.
I’m sorry for chasing you away by my directness, or worse, meanness, because I was so afraid and would not let you near me—the very tender, hurting core of me. My heart was so damaged I had to protect it from any vulnerability, from you ever getting too close to it.
I’m sorry for hitting you. A few of you. Not too hard. At least it did not feel too hard to me but I guess I don’t know my own strength. And I wasn’t even dating any of you when I did this. And I kicked one of you when I was eighteen, really hard. Growing up with four brothers, three older than I am, I guess I hadn’t yet learned I shouldn’t be physical like that with grown men, as a grown woman. You were not a brother and I had not grown up yet.
I’m sorry for venting my frustration at the world towards you because you’re a man. Frustration at a world that has been stacked against women for centuries and centuries. Frustration that we’re treated as sex objects, and need to be eye candy but to be more than that threatens the patriarchal systems so deeply entrenched in our culture.
It’s not your fault. You, as a person, did not set the events in place back in history which led to this time period of so much anger, pain, woundedness on the part of so many of us women, and on your part too. Those were other men who took up the swords and eventually guns, and took away our rights as women to worship on our own, do our own ceremonies for the Great Mystery and Great Mother, and more.
Those were other men who raped us, and tortured us, and burned many of us at the stake for being healers, for knowing the ways of the plants and their medicine and being powerful. For if any of us women were powerful and did not submit to our husband or the village men, or Christian henchmen, then we did not live very long. For many centuries.
I’m sorry for all of us, men and women, for the sordid history our culture has had—in mistreating people who are different, slavery, women as chattel and more. I’m sorry about the terrible human rights records etched through the centuries. I have not thought about how you, men, were subjugated also since there has only been room for one man at the top in the hierarchical system initiated a long, long time ago, and perpetuated since in just about every aspect of society. Odds are good you were not that one man.
You lived and worked under that one man and were in fear of how “the Man” would treat you, or judge you, or let go of you, or simply kill you. I have not thought about it from your angle until very recently. So when you came home to your wife or lover and “the Man” had dealt you some not very fair stuff, it’s easier for you to slip into your cave, I guess. Or easier for you to let your frustrations out at your family, I suppose. As hurtful as that was to your family.
Perhaps this is what led so many of you to rape your daughters, this sense of injustice from the rest of your lives and the need to have power over something, someone, since you had no power in the rest of your life?
For years, I wanted to play the victim and blame all of you. It was so cozy and safe to sit in my stories and make you all wrong. But I’ve been starting to understand how you’ve all been so hurt and repressed and, well, wounded by this patriarchal society. So very wounded. Not just me or other women. I don’t want to be a victim anymore. I want to own that we’ve all been in this together for a very long time and deeply hope and envision that the cycles and generations of wounding and pain can be healed. They don’t have to continue.
I’m sorry you were taught you could not cry or express your feelings honestly as a young boy. That you were taught to suppress your sorrow or hurt at the playground or at home. This has shut you off from me, from us women, too. I’d like to think I wouldn’t have taught you that, at least where I am in my life now. But it wasn’t under my control how our parents, teachers, and other adults spoke to you. Or how they modeled their behavior that taught you those unhealthy, stoic ways.
So many of you have turned to alcohol and drugs because of your inner pain. I’m sorry you’ve needed to escape there. This has hurt us even more. Both physically and emotionally.
I’m sorry for what the military has done to so many of you at such a young and vulnerable, vulnerable age. So many of you served either voluntarily or not, and have come home with ‘soldier’s heart.’ The wounds in your hearts are very hard to heal and we, as women, did not go through those horrors of war, most of us. We can’t know the sights you saw, or atrocities you might have done because you were told to, or atrocities you’ve been subjected to also. And you can’t tell us because it’s too painful to admit it to yourself in retrospect. I’m deeply sorry our world has been set up for you to be in those situations and to become a killing machine, or against all of which you previously valued.
And yes, it’s certainly very true many women’s hearts have been broken by watching their husbands, sons, lovers, fathers go off to battle and not come home. It is not that we have not deeply, deeply suffered. I just sense that ‘soldiers heart’ is a singularly heavy wounding and this helps explain why so many veterans are homeless on the streets. Partly, at least.
I know you’re not a machine. At least I’m learning this now at age fifty-four. I’m learning that you, so many of you, have such tender and broken hearts. And all the ways you’ve lashed out at us, women, or hurt us, violated us, sources from a terrible woundedness in our culture that taught you it was okay to gang up on a woman and assault her as a group because of your lust. Or date-rape her because she did not really fight you back. Or hit her because she spoke back.
I’m sorry for all the pain you’ve experienced because of the Dark/Shadow Feminine that resides within all of us women. Most of us have not even realized she resides within us but she can take us over at times and when that happens our behavior is downright ugly and hateful. This side of us wants to hurt others, both women and men, and will take no prisoners. And the Dark/Shadow Feminine is conniving, manipulative, resourceful and goes for blood. She’s scary. She scares me. But I’ve learned to identify her within me, and see the hurt that she has been sitting on, and heal that. For the most part. I, like you, am still a work in progress.
Some women live in their Dark/Shadow Feminine just about all the time. They deeply scare me. What especially terrifies me is how so many times these types of women are the most attractive, the most sexual, and are downright predatory and then take heads. Or hearts. With no remorse. I’m deeply sorry for all of you men, that you’ve experienced women such as this, for my sense is most of you have and they’ve scarred you for life. If not many lifetimes.
I’m sorry for the mothers who abandoned you in their desperation to find themselves or inability to cope with the emotional responsibilities of being a mother. I’m sorry for the mothers who were (and might still be) emotionally unbalanced and lashed out at you or whipped you or worse. I’m sorry for those of you whose mothers lived in their Dark/Shadow Feminine and used their powers to emasculate you with emotional torture and worse.
I’d like all of us to heal, to be able to feel our emotions and express them in healthy ways. I’d like all of us to understand that we as individuals are never going to see the world the same way. Or have the same gifts. I’d like us to be more patient with each other and learn how to truly listen well. Men and women are wired differently. We just are. I’d like us to better respect these differences. Understand them. I’d like women to not feel they need to become a man to survive in this world, especially the business world. I’d like men to truly respect women’s gifts in the workplace.
I’d like all of you men to feel safe enough to release your pain since it’s my sense that is at the root of much of your wounded hearts.
I’d like all of us to feel safe around each other. Safe enough to ask for a long hug and receive one with kindness and warmth behind it.
I’d like this a lot. Not just for me but for all of us.
To those of you men who have found the courage to heal, to work on your Divine Masculine and be authentic and cry when you need to, and really share from the heart, I have such respect for you. This helps you clear your wounded hearts and helps us see your hearts better. Please keep on doing it and showing other men you know, by your examples and sharings, for this is a beautiful path. A path of respect. A path for Real Men.
We women need you to be with us as we work to rediscover our Sacredness and our strengths. We don’t want to leave you behind or put you on a shelf while we do our work to discover our feminine powers of compassion, balance, voice and more. We want to heal this world and are finding the confidence to do so. We need you to be with us in this journey but we can’t do the work for you.
We need you in your fullest Divine Masculine to help birth this New World coming in, today. Just taking baby steps towards this would be such a gift to us and to yourselves. A huge gift. For us and for the next seven generations.
So, please forgive me for my part in the pain that’s been caused. I’m learning to love just about all of you. I’m still human and some of you, rather us, have done some horrific things to other people throughout history. Love toward men such as Hitler or Chinese leaders who are closing down Tibetan Buddhist monasteries, torturing monks and worse now—is tough for me, in this moment. Very tough. But I’m starting to see how the patriarchal systems based on fear could create such monsters, perhaps. I’m finding a little compassion for the men who got sucked in to those systems and went the path of darkness. A little.
Please forgive me. I’m sorry for my part in this deeply troubled world. I’m trying to heal my little corner of it, at least.
Thank you. I love you.
For more info about Mare Cromwell Visit MessagesFromMother.org
A few days ago, one of my Facebook friends asked the question, “What aspect of Deity do you work with on your Pagan or Wicca Paths“. I didn’t hesitate in my reply, as I remember the first day it happened, and days to follow that decision extremely well, and as if it happened yesterday.
I had made the decision to get serious about my spirituality in 1980. In the next year, I divorced my wife, lost my job, and moved from Youngstown, Ohio to Columbus, Ohio. I knew in the back of my head that I would meet a Teacher of Wicca somewhere in the area. I began a new job and a search for the meaning of witchcraft.
I found a Teacher, and studied there for just over two years, but something was missing for me in that Tradition. I moved on to “find the meat of all of this”, through another Teacher.
Columbus wasn’t good for me after 5 years, and I was slowly drowning in depression and debt. I was getting ready to “go over the edge” with city life, as I was raised pretty much a nature boy. Traffic, People, Noise, Concrete and Attitudes were going against me, all the time and I secretly searched for an escape to something more Pagan, or Earthy. Desperation and worry were setting in.
One night I had a strange and Very Vivid dream. One that changed my Life. The mere thought of the episode gives me goose bumps, even today. I dreamed the I was at a Gathering. The people there were dressed in robes of various sorts, and were moving up and down and past me between tents, on a dirt road and looked vaguely familiar to me ,in some of their faces. It was like an old fair or market scene from out of the distant past, with tents and food and vendors. I wandered into one of the tents, and someone handed me a cup of instant coffee. For some reason, I gulped the entire cup of dry coffee, and immediately came alive and began choking on the dry mixture in my mouth and throat. I stumbled back out of the tent, and was crouched down in the street, chocking with my head down. My eyes were looking down at the ground.
Suddenly, out of my peripheral vision to the right of me, I saw the bottom of a dark crimson ; almost dark maroon, cape, and I felt a presence like I have never felt before. Strong and Sleek and Sure, is the only way I can describe the presence. I heard a female voice say to me, , “Are you all right…….?” There was a feminine soft and concerned tone in the voice. The I felt the presence brush around me as I was kneeling there in the street. The cape brushed me a little. She came around me to my left side, bent down and looked out from under the cowl of her cape , at me , in the face ,with beautiful dark eyes, a mature woman’s face and kind manner, and said, “No, of coarse your not…………let me help you……..” And with that, I physically felt her fingers wrap around and grab my left upper arm and I was being helped up . She helped me back into the tent where I had came from, and gave me a wooden bowl of water. I drank and my thirst was quenched. I felt the chocking subside, and I could swallow once again. I was relieved.
The next scene involved me walking to another tent away down at the end of the dirt street, and again passing by people going to and from ‘the meeting’. I went inside the tent, and it as pretty dark, but I could still see some of the faces in the crowd, and many looked familiar. They were sitting on both sides of a fairly long room and a long banquet table was at the far end, and there were 6 seats occupied buy people ,I felt, were ‘official’ ,in some capacity. I listened and heard voices, both male and female, but I didn’t know what they were saying. When it seemed like they were almost finished with their business, I stood up from my seated place on the right of the room, among the crowd, and said, “May I address the council, please?”
Instantly I was down in front of the six council members. I knelt down on both knees and placed the top of my head on the dirt floor. My right arm stretched straight out beside me and my fingers of my hand cupped and curled and made the sign of the Moon. My left arm went straight out to the other side of me and the fingers made the sign of Horns; Pinky and Index and Thumb out, and the other fingers curled under to the palm. I looked partly up and partly down, and I could see the crescent Moon, in the sky, behind the six people in front of me. I said” I want to thank the council for allowing me to serve and to speak.” (It was if I had already spoken something, but I don’t remember what I said)
Then I said, “And I want to especially thank the Lady who helped me to get here tonight, and ask that she receive this token and gift of my esteem.” And with that I produced from under my cloak, and beautiful sparkling white Rose., and held it up to the council to receive. Someone took the Rose, and I felt a “thank you” and ‘it will be passed on’.
I woke up. I remember saying in my head, ‘That Was Real‘!
About 3 weeks later, I discovered an event coming up that I thought would be fun and a chance to get away from it all. It was a Pagan group who sponsored a festival called Goddess gathering, just East of Cambridge, Ohio. It was a primitive camping event. I like to rough it when I camp. I was excited. I purchased the tickets, and went to the event. It was wet and muddy and simply wonderful, to me, and I got a chance to network and commune with like minded people who were into Witchcraft and Paganism. Many of the faces I saw there were familiar to me, just like in the dream.
I had a chance to speak with the facilitators of the event, and asked them if I could volunteer my labor skills to the Land, on weekends. They were delighted to have someone volunteer. Through my conversations with the couple, I related my dream, and they both stared at one another, almost in disbelief, and told me that that woman in the dream was the Goddess Hecate.
To this day, I have been a servant of the Goddess Hecate.
Lord Sige’-Jen I
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